From - 'Seasons of the Word' (Fr. Denis McBride C.Ss.R.)

In today’s Gospel Matthew gives a setting for addressing issues and problems which arise in the life of the organised community of the local church. He is writing at a time when Jesus is present, not in the flesh, but in the spirit, wherever two or three are gathered in his name. The theme is the relationship of members of the church, “brothers” to one another, in an offence that violates the bond of brotherhood. Matthew writes this instruction in the setting of an address given by Jesus to his disciples.

The advice is straightforward: “If your brother does something wrong, go and have it out with him alone, between your two selves." The Gospel says that the offended party, not the offending one, should first seek reconciliation. It counsels personal intervention and honest confrontation. It encourages members of the Christian community to straighten things out with each other privately, if that is at all possible. Christians are to deal with each other candidly and personally – no anonymous complaints to the authorities, no whisper campaigns. The purpose of confronting a brother who has done wrong is not to humiliate him, but to be reconciled with him. It is an honest attempt to avoid a poison tree springing up between two Christians.

If private reconciliation fails, another attempt must bemade by invoking the help of one or two others, who are to try to settle the matter before it goes public. Only when this fails is the offended party to bring the matter to the attention of the whole community. If the wayward brother is still impenitent, he must be excluded from the life of the community. The decision of the local community will be the decision of God: as God inspires them in making the decision, so God will also honour their judgement.

Love: the one thing that cannot hurt your neighbour
All the practical advice in the Gospel centres on Christians taking responsibility for each other. Belonging to a community implies being involved in the life of its members. This is not a charter for the legion of the curious, but a procedure for a caring community to follow. It is a way of handling wrongdoing and hurt. Just as conflict is sure to happen in a community of sinners, so confrontation can sometimes be the only language of love. Like the story of the poison tree, the refusal to confront ends up in being the refusal to love.

Paul tells us in today’s second reading: “Love is the one thing that cannot hurt your neighbour.” If love faces the real, it cannot avoid facing conflict. Where silence would permit greater division in the community, love must do something. As Edmund Burke noted: “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.” And doing nothing in the face of wrong doing and hurt is precisely what the Gospel opposes.

Today’s Gospel is not easy to follow. So we try to approach each other gingerly, hoping that our halting efforts at giving voice to our hurt will be accepted in the best spirit. It may not work, but it beats planting a fatal orchard with our anger.